Rabbi Gloria

Independent Seattle Rabbi: Destination Weddings · Interfaith Weddings · Jewish Weddings · Baby Namings

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A Jewish Interfaith Wedding with a South American Feel

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A New Jersey couple from different corners of the world met in a restaurant five years ago and it completely changed their lives.  He was originally from Jersey, on track to a legal career, following in the footsteps of his father.  Living in Washington D.C. to gain experience prior to law school, he started working in a restaurant to earn some extra money.  He found he loved it and returned back to Jersey to begin a career in the hospitality business.
 
The woman was born and raised in Lima, Peru where as long as she can remember, she felt a burning desire to come to America.  She struck out on her own, made it to the states, ended up working at the restaurant where the groom worked.  The rest is history, as they say.
 
 
 
 
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The venue they chose, pictured above,  was in Montclair, called “The Highlawn,“ and was set high in the hills with a view of NYC.  It was actually used by General George Washington during the Revolutionary War as a look-out point.  I created an interfaith service for them and it was truly magical to witness the participation by her friends and family who were able to come from Peru for the event.  The ceremony had a wonderful South American feel. Her grandfather was from a remote town in the mountains of Peru where they still ride donkeys and horses, while here,  she is on track to a teaching career in our 21st century world of technology.
 
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It was truly a privilege to officiate at this Jewish interfaith wedding. It was a union of two very diverse cultures. What a great moment it was! After he broke the glass Mazel Tov and Te Feliciato’s was shouted out by all!
 
 
 
 
 

Same Sex Wedding in Upper Manhattan

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Glasses, Sparkling Wine, Cheers, Sun Set, Evening     

A colleague of mine recommended that two women call me to arrange for a same sex wedding in NYC.  They had such an interesting story.  They had both been previously married and were living in the mountain area of North Carolina.  Their common work field was speech pathology.  I spoke to each of them and we started working on the service.  They were raising two boys, 9 and 7, who were going to be the ring bearers.  The 20-something daughter of one of the women was an actress in the city who they decided would read the English version of the Sheva Brachot.  Her boyfriend, an actor, was the videographer.

     As luck would have it the brother of the bride owned a restaurant in Inwood where a small group of about 20 friends and family assembled.  With the strains of Frank Sinatra in the background as part of the restaurant vibe, I conducted a ceremony and declared them Wife and Wife.  They spoke the vows they had written, then broke two glasses, and many tears and laughter were  a part of this special service!  

     Before the meal began we celebrated Shabbat together with candle lighting, prayer over the bread and wine and I blessed all present. I stayed for a wonderful dinner and they presented me with a beautiful gift of handicrafted slate and wood that a craftsman from the town had done.  As i rode back downtown on the A-train their warmth and love pervaded me.  

Mazel Tov and Best Wishes to them!

 

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A Baby Naming Ceremony! My Brides and Grooms Having Children.

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     I love to see my brides and grooms having children!    

     I  officiated at the interfaith wedding, two years ago, of two lawyers. One was brought up Catholic, the other one Jewish.   I co-officiated with a wonderful Catholic priest, Father Tom who had been the family priest.  We worked on the service with the bride and groom and it was warm, witty and personal.   Even the day’s weather cooperated at sunset on a rooftop in Tribeca.  I got to know both sets of parents and felt that the families welcomed me into the event.

    How amazing it was when I received the email from the bride that she had a little girl some months back and wanted me  to do a baby-naming ceremony  with the priest.   It was Father Tom and I again at a historic building in Park Slope this winter.  We had the opportunity to plan an interfaith baby-naming and it was my first one.   I visited the couple who lived in a  former church converted into a condo in Brooklyn.  The sun through the stain glass windows and the soaring ceilings made it a  magical  place.  They had much input deciding to do blessings themselves and give honors to their parents and grandparents.  Tom and I filled in the blanks with prayers and blessings ourselves. The ceremony was enjoyed by Emily their daughter of seven months. She didn’t cry through the whole thing, so I guess we did something right.  

     I find myself fortunate to connect with my past brides and grooms and  be at these wonderful events of the next generation they have produced.  The fact that another officiant can work with me to produce a spiritual inclusive service is something  I am proud of.

baby naming april 2013

 

      

 

 

Lovely review from a lovely bride on WeddingWire!

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I co-officiated a wonderful interfaith wedding this fall at the Dolce Hotel, in Basking Ridge N.J.  Renata, the beautiful bride, wrote me a very nice review in Wedding Wire, and I do appreciate it!

http://wwcdn.weddingwire.com/static/6.6.36/images/logo/ww-logo-246x109.pngHer words from  Weddingwire.com:    “My ceremony was co-officiated by Rabbi Milner and she did a fantastic job! Rabbi Milner took the time to listen and meet with my now-husband and me and created a beautiful ceremony for us. I think by-far, the ceremony was the best part of my wedding and Rabbi Milner helped bring it about! Thank you, Rabbi Milner. I would recommend Rabbi Milner for a co-officiated Jewish ceremony.”

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 Many thanks, Renata!

Here is the blog: It was such a pleasure to co-officiate a wonderful interfaith wedding this past weekend at the Dolce Hotel, in Basking Ridge N.J.   The couple, bride Russian Jewish and the Groom Catholic with some Russian blood came to me many months ago and asked if I would co- officiate with the groom’s father’s priest.  The father of the groom had attended this church for many years and it was important to have Father Joe present at the ceremony.  I agreed and right there in my apartment the four of us set out to create the service. We were able to weave together the unity candle and the Baal Shem Tov’s (father of Hasidism) concept of light.  And when it came time for the Sign of Peace I spoke about the concept of Shalom which of course means peace in Hebrew but also involves a spiritual wholeness and peace of mind. READ MORE

It was such a pleasure to co-officiate a wonderful interfaith wedding this past weekend at the Dolce Hotel, in Basking Ridge N.J. 

 

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A Jewish Fall Fantasy Wedding

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      Two Cornell law school graduates contacted me almost a year ago to plan their Jewish fall fantasy wedding for October this year.  They met at the law school and both were enamored of the fall season particularly beautiful upstate New York, where there is colorful foliage, apple picking, pumpkins and crisp clear air.  They planned to have the wedding near Cornell, near the Finger Lakes. 

     We met at their Hoboken apartment  and I was introduced to their dog-child: an adorable Welsh terrier who was to walk down the aisle.

     Since I enjoy destination weddings, I came up the day before their ceremony and helped with the rehearsal.  The groom, from Tennessee, had many relatives there already.  They had rented a lovely house for family to stay in and did the rehearsal in the back of the house.  Afterwards the rehearsal  dinner reminded me of my own college days with large amounts of pizza and beer to go around.

     The day of the wedding was unseasonably  warm – over 70 degrees – and all the trees glistened in the sun’s rays.  They had picked a venue: The FountainBleu Inn, which was a lovingly restored, 1815 country inn with authentic antiques and beautiful grounds.  The wedding was on the grass overlooking a lake.  The chupah and chairs faced the water and a panoply of multicolored trees.  The bride planned every detail of this herself while working at a high pressure law job in NYC.  How amazing was that?

     When it came time for the bride and groom to do their vows they prepared speeches about themselves.  The words spoken to each other were so moving and heartfelt that both bride, groom and audience were reduced to tears.  We also did the Hebrew vow from the Song of Songs King Solomon.  There were readings, circling in the Jewish tradition and breaking the glass.  They danced up the aisle after the end of the ceremony and frolicked with their dog on the acres of grass.  We were treated to a beautiful sunset  as well.

     I stayed for a wonderful reception.  Lots of dancing and warmth abounded.  The groom danced with his mother to L0uis Armstrong’s “It’s a wonderful world” which for this day in time it certainly was.  They even treated me to a stay at the Inn on Columbia, an amazing upscale restored home with an owner who was my personal chef the morning after.  Regretfully I left to return to NYC.

 

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The pictures above were taken by the wedding’s wonderful photographer, Anna Simonak. Many thanks to her for the use of these shots!

You can see her beautiful work here: Asimonak.smugmug.com

Prospect Park Brooklyn hosts a magical interfaith wedding ceremony

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  A bride contacted me a few months ago about officiating a small interfaith wedding ceremony in Prospect Park, Brooklyn, Labor Day weekend.  The couple had been together 10 years, engaged one year.  All their family and friends were asking “so what is taking you so long?”  The time was right and I met with them in my apartment to plan the service.  The groom was Jamaican and the bride Russian Jewish.  The groom was open to an almost entirely Jewish wedding ceremony. 

They lived and played in Brooklyn and loved the park.  I went there a few weeks ago before the wedding to look at the site in the park they had picked.  A small clearing overlooking the lake.  Private and quiet.  The rules of the park were you could have no more than 25 people in attendance and so it was an intimate group.

     The hand-held chupah and doing it open air were throwbacks to the traditional Jewish weddings in Europe many centuries ago.  The groom’s sister read the Sheckyanu prayer transliterated and it was wonderful to see this slight black woman repeating the Hebrew.  All their friends representing many nations and races  participated in the Sheva Brachot.  The feeling at that service was one of warmth, inclusiveness and joy for the couple.  Life in this twenty first century should only be this wonderful.

     Afterward at the reception in a Williamsburg restaurant overlooking the Manhattan skyline I spent time getting to know their friends and family: a  former correction officer at Rikers Island now working as an extra in the movies, a Burmese woman who is a resident in internal medicine at a hospital in Brooklyn, and the photographer, a lively black woman  Michelle Etwaroo  was talented and user friendly to the couple and me.  And she was funny!  Instead of saying cheese for the posing she said Mazel Tov!  Check out her website,  www.MichelleEtwaroo.com when you get a chance.

     I can only say that I returned home filled with gratitude that I could participate in the best New York can be in the vibrancy and wonder of all peoples joining together.

A Beautiful Jewish Wedding – Of My Best Friend’s Daughter!

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       I recently officiated at the Jewish wedding of a bride who is the daughter of close friends of mine, going back 35 years. When I first met the bride, a day after she was born in 1984 at NY Hospital, I was looking at her through the glass window in the baby nursery. She has long been a part of the fabric of my family’s life and is just two years older than my son. He used to enjoy playing with an ”older woman!”

   I watched her through her childhood, adolescence and college years. She was always a woman of definite opinions. Everyone admired her spunk and confidence even for one so young. She started dating a military man and it turned out he had been deployed to Iraq twice. She ended up enlisting in the reserves herself and goes once a month to an army base for her commitment. I got to know him over their several years together and grew to appreciate his sensitivity, loyalty to her, and his quiet confidence. They decided to marry and asked me to officiate.

   Seeing them together is a study in complimentary attributes. She bubbles over with enthusiasm and energy and he looks at her in sheer amazement, but is beaming. Together they support and compliment one another. When I spend time with them I feel uplifted by their loving and easy relationship.

 

   The wedding was at the Brooklyn Botanical Garden the first weekend of June. The night before and even into the early morning the rains came. But two hours before the service the sky cleared and it turned into a picture-perfect June day. They did the wedding in the open air, as was the traditional Jewish custom and they had a lovely chamber music trio setting the tone.

     It was the first wedding I conducted where I felt I might be in tears throughout because of the closeness to the family. But because the bride bounded down the aisle, all smiles and beaming I took my cues from her and didn’t lose it.

   Her father, however, was crying throughout the service . He ended up delivering the benediction which is done at the end of every Jewish service. It was so very touching. Afterwards the reception was warm and filled with music and love. My son and his girlfriend came in from out of town for the event. I felt like I had everyone who loved me around to celebrate this wonderful event.

 

Check out the wedding planner Leigh who makes it all seem so easy   http://www.palmhouse.com/

My Most Famous Wedding of Creativity

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What would you say about 2 people who meet in Boston working for an architecture firm from two different worlds and religions? The groom is a quiet man from Michigan from a Midwestern family with strong ties to the University in Ann Arbor and from a Christian tradition. The bride hails from Springfield Mass whose love is a house her grandfather built on Lake George where she spent summers. She was brought up Jewish.

 

I visited this house when I was officiating last summer near by and the bride added her touch by designing and renovating the kitchen. She and her fiance designed the staircase to a balcony on the top of the house. When we were discussing the wedding they mentioned that they were designing a modern chupaph which is pictured here.

So it was when I met her family at the house I saw her mother’s pottery and beautiful art work adorning the walls. Her mother had a green thumb and was planting annuals that summer to be used for the fall wedding. They were even creative in the choice of venue. A summer camp right on Lake George with an outdoor and indoor space that was rustic and beautiful.

The bride had graphic artistic talents and designed and created all the invitations and place cards for the table settings. She even designed the dress and had it made nearby. There wasn’t anything this family couldn’t put together. We spent many hours fashioning the service and they took an active role in helping me. One can only believe that their talent, artistic skills and cooperative mind set will bring them many years of exciting projects and marital bliss.